As the middle-aged woman headed out the door to meet up with friends, she noticed a group text from her youngest sister. Swiping open the message, she saw that her 76-year-old mother was on the way to the emergency department with chest pains and tightness, difficulty breathing and high blood pressure.
In an instant, the woman grabbed her bag and simultaneously messaged her friends that she was headed to the hospital to be with her mom, arriving within minutes. While the medical staff provided updates and the woman’s mother reviewed test results that were showing up in her patient portal, the woman maintained timely family communication. When the immediate danger was past and it became a waiting game, the woman and her mom tapped away on their respective phones, made a few group calls and did a video chat with one of the grandchildren.
Having spent ample time in hospitals with loved ones who passed away decades ago, this matriarch and her family were appreciative of the ability to stay in touch through messaging tools – and her loved ones were able to rest easier as night fell.
Whether it’s during an emergency situation or everyday chats, family connection and communication are essential for both happiness and health. And although nothing replaces the warmth of a big hug, social media platforms make it easier than ever to stay in touch in a meaningful manner.
The Importance of Staying Socially Connected
People of all ages need social connections to survive and thrive. But as people age, they often find themselves spending more time alone. Whether it’s the result of retirement, friends moving, the death of loved ones, grown children who are busy, a disability or any other situation, becoming socially isolated can put your physical and mental health at risk.
Did you know that hearing loss can also lead to increased isolation? When individuals are unable to hear well and participate in conversations – in person or over the phone – it can cause them to withdraw from social interactions.
“Those who are socially isolated or lonely are more likely to be admitted to the emergency room or to a nursing home,” according to the NIH National Institute on Aging(Opens in a new window). Social isolation and loneliness also are associated with higher risks for:
- Anxiety
- Depression
- Cognitive decline
- Dementia, including Alzheimer’s disease
- High blood pressure
- Heart disease
- Obesity
- Weakened immune function
- Death
People who are lonely and feel disconnected from others may not take the time to exercise, get enough quality sleep or buy, prepare and eat healthy food. Some lonely seniors may turn to drinking excessive alcohol, smoking or filling their days with sedentary activities. These factors can contribute to poor physical and mental health, so it’s wise to keep an eye on your loved ones to encourage ongoing family connection.
Dementia and Alzheimer’s Disease
Social isolation and loneliness may also be bad for brain health, the National Institute on Aging(Opens in a new window) reports. Loneliness and social isolation have been linked to poorer cognitive function and higher risk for dementia(Opens in a new window), including and especially for Alzheimer’s disease(Opens in a new window). Reduced social activity and being alone most of the time may contribute to a decline in the ability to perform everyday tasks such as driving, paying bills, taking medicine and cooking.
How to Create More Family Connections
Humans are social creatures who crave companionship, seek out personal connections and find solace in shared experiences. During the global pandemic that began in 2020, people of all ages experienced feelings of isolation and loneliness.
After going through this ourselves and with society shining a light on this issue, it helped many of us become more empathetic toward our elderly relatives and neighbors. As people sought out creative ways to maintain connections when it was difficult to see each other face-to-face, it started a wave of new uses and new users of social media platforms and digital tools.
“Smartphone ownership and social media use among older adults has continued to grow,” according to a recent Pew Research study(Opens in a new window). Utilizing both new media and old-school habits can help seniors feel loved, appreciated and valued. Here are some ways you can foster ongoing family communication:
- Phone Calls: If your senior loved one is tech-averse, a good old-fashioned phone call is a great place to start. The trick is to initiate the call yourself. Many elderly parents don’t want to be a burden, so when you pick up the phone, even for a five-minute conversation, it can lighten your loved one’s mental load and provide a much-needed social outlet.
- Text Messages and Emails: Sometimes a quick “I love you” text goes a long way. Show your senior family member how to text if they don’t already know how. Emails are also a useful way to spread joy. You can go beyond words by taking photos of your children with a LEGO project or sidewalk art and texting or emailing them. Grandparents are delighted by these special creations.
- Video Chats: Choose a digital tool that will work well for your loved one – such as FaceTime(Opens in a new window) (for iOS devices), Glide(Opens in a new window) (Google devices), Zoom(Opens in a new window) or Google Hangouts(Opens in a new window) – and teach them how to use it. If your loved one has in-home help, their caregiver can often help facilitate video chats. Consider scheduling a time to video chat with your loved one on a regular basis, giving them something to look forward to. Visits don’t have to be a sit-down conversation. You may arrange to cook the same meal “together,” enjoy a cup of coffee while sitting on your respective balconies or wish them “sweet dreams” before bed.
- Virtual Story Time: Readeo(Opens in a new window) is an app that lets your elderly loved ones have virtual story time with the grandkids through the integrated BookChat. Users can choose a 7-day free trial (Opens in a new window)or you can provide a gift subscription(Opens in a new window). Libraries may also have options (Opens in a new window)for your family to choose from.
- Letters and Packages: Letter writing isn’t the latest technology, but that’s why it may appeal so much to your senior loved ones. Stock up on stationery, envelopes and stamps – or make it yourself using sites like Canva(Opens in a new window) – and become pen pals! Include artwork from the children or recent homework pages showing what they’re learning. You could also surprise them with a bouquet of flowers, a care package of their favorite goodies or a delicious meal from a local restaurant. Small gestures like this can make your family member’s day.
- Consistency: While this isn’t a type of activity, consistency is the most important aspect of connection activities. Use your smartphone’s calendar or reminder apps to keep you on schedule with weekly, daily or other regular check-ins. Engage your children in ways they can stay in touch with their grandparents, which teaches them empathy and the importance of family connection. Your loved ones will appreciate and look forward to reading your words, hearing your voice or seeing your face.
In addition to the help you provide to family members, you and they can also find age-appropriate training from organizations like AARP. Their SeniorPlanet(Opens in a new window) section offers a range of technology, including topics such as Hosting an Online Zoom (Demo), a Tech Discussion Group (lunch and learn) and Messaging Apps (lecture). Some even offer a call-in phone option for those who aren’t ready for an online learning session.
How to Use Social Media to Communicate
After learning to connect with family virtually – or expanding their use of digital resources – seniors can use some of those skills to broaden their world.
While we often hear about the harmful effects of social media use on younger groups, studies show that older adults who use social media actually have increased social support and greater life satisfaction. Increased daily social media use is associated with a more positive mood among older adults who have smaller social networks, according to a 2023 journal article in Innovation in Aging.(Opens in a new window)
The same article states that approximately 73% of community-dwelling individuals in the United States aged 50–64 years and almost half of those 65 years and older report using social media, meaning that it’s already becoming a viable option for keeping seniors connected. Older adults who use social media typically do so several times a week, while many use it daily. Here are some tips for making it work for your family’s needs to deliver positive benefits:
- Find out if your aging loved ones use social media already. If so, connect with them on their preferred social media platform – even it’s not your preferred option. Make a point to check on their personal page several times each week to see how they’re doing and make comments on their posts. Share posts on your Facebook, Instagram or other platform that they will appreciate – even if it’s not the same social media you spend most of your time on.
- For social media sites that they’re more likely to just visit and not interact with – like YouTube and TikTok – help them find reputable and interesting accounts to follow. Guide them away from messaging that indulges in conspiracy theories, industries or individuals that prey on seniors, or brands that may entice them into buying items they don’t need. Sadly, click- and view-driven algorithms can lead to toxic content in their social media feeds.
- Suggest fun or informative online groups they can interact with, such as The Ethel Circle Facebook group(Opens in a new window) (from AARP), local community organizations, faith-based or hobby-based groups, or other online connection points like Gransnet(Opens in a new window).
- Check their settings to provide some guardrails against them going down a bad path. You may also want to turn on alerts that go to your phone so you can notice if they start making a lot of random donations or other unwise decisions. Depending on their cognitive level, you may want to have access to their user names and passwords so you can pop into their account occasionally to encourage safe social media activity.
- Teach them about trolls – how to avoid them and how to avoid being one. Whether it’s a post for a local news organization, popular publication or even a friend’s page, there are people who comment just to stir up trouble. There are also well-meaning older adults who want to “set others straight” by sharing their wisdom or experience with social media posters – or they get a dopamine hit from the art of arguing. In fact, Forbes recently addressed this(Opens in a new window): “We all get angry about the things that make us passionate (and rightly so), but are we being drawn into a kind of addictive rage where chastisement and assumptions make us feel so much better than atonement and nuance?”
How BrightStar Care Creates Connections
With so many opportunities to connect virtually, it’s clear that being physically distant doesn’t have to stop you from bonding with your elderly loved ones. Still, you may have concerns about their daily health and safety that you can’t address from afar – especially if they have Alzheimer’s disease or another form of dementia. That’s where home care services come in.
At each BrightStar Care location, the nurses and caregivers believe that caring is more than just a job – it’s a way of life. We offer A Higher Standard™ of compassionate care in the comfortable, familiar surroundings of home.
With a wide range of in-home, nurse-led services to choose from, we’ll be there for your loved ones – giving you peace of mind when you can’t be there. To learn how we can help, contact us online, call 866-618-7827 or search for a location near your family member.
At each BrightStar Care location, the nurses and caregivers believe that caring is more than just a job – it’s a way of life. We offer A Higher Standard™ of compassionate care in the comfortable, familiar surroundings of home.
With a wide range of in-home, nurse-led services to choose from, we’ll be there for your loved ones – giving you peace of mind when you can’t be there. To learn how we can help, contact us online, call 866-618-7827 or search for a location near your family member.